Tuesday 2 August 2016 by Neil Tollfree

Final name on David Cameron’s resignation honours list revealed to be ‘David Cameron’


David Cameron

The controversy surrounding David Cameron’s resignation honours list has grown by one after it was announced that ‘David Cameron’ has been included.

Recommended for a Knighthood for ‘always being smartly turned out and generally brilliant,’ the former PM will become Sir David Cameron in the New Year.

“The entire thing smacks of cronyism,” said Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn.

“David Cameron’s Honours list consists of his friends, his wife, his children, his favourite pig, the girl who does Samantha’s cappuccino, and a man who lent him 20p to use the toilets at London Victoria station.”

However, a friend of David Cameron has hit back claiming the PM was thoroughly deserving of the honour.

“It’s well deserved, definitely,” he said.

“David won nearly all three of his referendums and brought in a private jet for the sole use of the PM and his cabinet, so of course he deserves his knighthood.”

The Public had mixed opinions over Mr Cameron’s potential knighthood. Seasonal leaf painter Simon Williams was asked if Mr Cameron deserved the honour.

“I’m not sure,” he responded

“Is the knighthood being awarded for being a pig-f**king c**t with a face like a laminated baby who completely f**ked the country in a frivolous referendum orchestrated for the sole purpose of him and his mates’ clinging on to power?”

It was confirmed that this was not the reason for Mr Cameron’s inclusion on the Honours list.

“right, then No.”

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