Friday 24 June 2016

Foreigners still not f**ked off yet


referendum result

Despite a clear triumph for the Leave campaign several hours ago, it seems that many foreigners still haven’t f**ked off yet.

Simon Williams, a stockbroker from Cheshire, was left amazed when the Polish builders who were building his conservatory turned up as usual at 8am.

“Frankly, I think it’s a bit rich,” he said.

“Like most people, I voted Brexit so that these people would f**k off and yet here they are bold as brass being all foreign in my nice new conservatory.

“I would have thought that in the wake of Britain voting to leave the EU I’d have got a nice cheery collection of working class Englishmen, all quaffing tea and being respectful of the Queen.”

Mr Williams’ isn’t the only report of foreigners not f**king off yet, with other foreigners being seen treating patients in hospitals, cleaning toilets in offices, and looking after children in nurseries.

Eleanor Gay, a Mum of two from Cleethorpes was left stunned when an Italian man served her cappuccino as usual from her favourite coffee shop.

“Mario, yes, he’s lovely,” she said, girlish attraction flashing across her face.

“But, as a foreigner, I’d definitely have expected him to have f**ked off by now.”

There are now very real fears that if foreigners don’t f**k off by lunchtime, the referendum result could lose all credibility and we’ll then have to spend another ten weeks doing it all again.

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