Saturday 11 June 2016 by Neil Tollfree

Wasps reach out to bees’ PR team


wasps get bees PR team

The PR team responsible for the recent stunning boost in the profile of bees will now work to do the same with wasps.

“Frankly, we’re tired of being viewed as summer’s bad guys,” said a spokesperson for wasps across the country.

“We’re nice insects, I mean there’s Dave in my nest, right? He runs a weekly crèche for baby wasps so their parents get to have a bit of time to themselves.

“But you never hear about that, do you? Whenever we’re discussed it’s all ‘oh wasps ruined my picnic,’ ‘wasps ate all the jam,’ ‘wasps got drunk and had a massive fight’.”

In recent years, bees have gone from being overweight wasps to messianic saviours of all flowers and the global food chain as a result of a campaign by Taylor and Lebon Public Relations.

“We’re really looking forward to working with wasps,” said campaign leader Simon Williams.

“We are going to work hard to show all the positive aspects of the species, and by Christmas we think that kids will be asking Santa for a pet wasp.”

An exasperated wasp continued, “Look, I don’t want to keep having a go at bees – some of my best mates are bees – but the fact is they are a bunch of massive stingy bastards. I mean, we’re half the size of them, how bad can we be?”

The campaign will kick off with a ‘fun with wasps’ leaflet and a short film about a wasp planning to audition for Britain’s Got Talent.

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: