Friday 10 June 2016

Queen definitely expecting second set of presents


The Queen's second birthday

The Queen is definitely expecting a second present from anyone who is invited to her second birthday party.

Less than two months since her last birthday party, the Queen will celebrate both in public and in private before opening what is expected to be ‘lots and lots’ of further presents.

A palace source told us, “Birthday parties are wonderful, and people are so generous with the Queen – I expect she’d have a third birthday, given the chance.”

When questioned as to why having a second birthday just 50 days since the last one is so important, we were told, “Presents. It’s obviously about the presents.

“I mean, what would be the point of inviting anyone to your second birthday if you didn’t expect them to bring you a second birthday present?

“The Queen could literally buy anything she wants, but that’s boring – so it’s much more fun to let other people worry what to buy for a woman who can literally buy anything she wants.

“As it happens, she’s in quite a good mood, as you can imagine for someone having their second birthday in two months.

“She even found Charles’ Dignitas voucher amusing.”

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