Friday 3 June 2016 by Neil Tollfree

Government powerless to stop EU floods entering Britain claim ‘Vote Leave’


Vote Brexit

‘Vote Leave’ has enraged the Remain campaign by claiming that EU regulations mean the UK will have to accept some of the floods currently plaguing France and Germany.

“It is a policy of the EU that there is complete freedom of movement of floods throughout the continent,” said bizarre baby-man and ‘Vote Leave’ campaigner Michael Gove.

“The French and the Germans could at any point choose to move up to 30% of flood water to Britain, and there is simply nothing we can do about it.

“This is just one more reason to vote for Brexit.”

However, the ‘Stronger in Europe’ campaign has refuted the claims in the strongest possible terms.

“Balderdash,” said equally bizarre baby-man and Prime Minister David Cameron.

“Thanks to my recent renegotiation, the UK has the right to refuse any and all EU floods.

“In fact, some of the floods currently plaguing mainland Europe were destined for the South of England, but because of our strong position, we were able to refuse it and let France and Germany take all of it.”

Fact checkers have confirmed that Mr Cameron did indeed secure the right to refuse EU floods, but unfortunately made no such provision for that mizzly fine rain that soaks you right through.

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