Friday 27 May 2016 by Neil Tollfree

Man looking forward to new Ghostbusters film ‘must be some sort of arsehole’


Ghostbusters

The shocking emergence of a man who is quite looking forward to the new Ghostbusters film has led to speculation that he must be some sort of total arsehole.

“Look, I’m not saying it’ll be Citizen Kane,’ said Simon Williams, a reasonable human being from somewhere north of Leicester.

“I’m just saying, I’m quite looking forward to it, I mean Melissa McCarthy? Paul Feig? They’ve made some cracking films.”

But representatives of the Internet were quick to disagree.

“Absolute rubbish,” said one.

“It’s got girls in, and they smell. So it’s definitely going to be a load of plops.”

A Hollywood insider provided further insight.

“I’ve got a mate who works at the local Odeon, so I know what’s what,” he confided.

“Apparently everyone involved in the film is a communist paedophile immigrant and every day on set they took drugs, summoned the devil and ate GM foods.

“This bloke must be some sort of bastard to be looking forward to it.”

Another claimed to have seen a preview copy.

“A profoundly evil movie. Throughout the film there are subliminal messages that will send everyone who sees it totally mad, and they’ll take to the streets in an orgy of violence and depravity that will bring about the end of society as we know and will leave Paul Feig as the King of this shattered world with his four hideous she-devils doing his bidding.

“Seven out of ten, worth a watch.”

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