Wednesday 9 March 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Haunted Nazi Jack-O-Lantern continues bizarre political success


Donald Trump

Donald Trump is still doing terrifyingly well at running for President.

Despite being grown and born in Hitler’s personal vegetable patch, the monster known as Trump continues to rampage through the nomination stage, having taken two more caucuses yesterday.

“It’s like one of those B-Movies your grandparents used to insist were really good,” said political commentator, Simon Williams.

“Just imagine if a pumpkin was possessed with the spirit of the Third Reich, carved itself something resembling a face, strapped on something resembling hair and then ran for President.

“That’s essentially what we are dealing with here.

“Lots of Americans seem to like him though; I guess Halloween is a pretty big deal over there but that’s not really a good foundation for electing the leader of the free world.

“Either that or some of them are a little bit racist and might think Hitler had the right idea, but that’s not something I can imagine happening in an enlightened country.”

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