Wednesday 2 March 2016

Osama Bin Laden left huge porn stash to ‘favourite nephew’


Osama Bin Laden

The will of dead terrorist Osama Bin Laden has been released to the media, showing he left huge trove of pornography to his favourite nephew.

Documents released by US officials show that Kevin Bin Laden received three suitcases of pornographic magazines, dated between 1973 and 1985, after the Al Qaeda leader was killed in 2011.

As one section of the will reads, “And to my nephew Kevin I leave my smut collection. This was very dear to me in the days before I became a lunatic, and was lovingly put together during my formative years.

“From Barely Legal to Hustler, to some of my more specialised editions of Juggs and Asian Babes, I can only hope they bring you the hours of pleasure they brought me.”

“Look after them, keep them clean and hopefully one day you will pass them on to one of your own relatives.

“There’s a first edition Razzle from 1983 in pristine condition – well, almost pristine – that one might well be worth a few quid one day.

“Oh, and the Summer of ’78 was a particularly good time for printed pornography – I’d start there.”

US government officials defended the release of the will, insisting it was most definitely in the public interest.

White House official Chuck Williams explained, “I think most people already knew it, but now you have proof that Osama Bin Laden was a massive wanker.”

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