Thursday 18 February 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Irony extravaganza as Nike ends business deal on ‘moral basis’


Manny Pacquiao dropped by Nike

Shoe manufacturer and employers of children, Nike, have ended their business relationship with Manny Pacquiao after he said something quite nasty.

The boxer and spellcheck-nightmare said that homosexuals are “worse than animals”, which is a horrible thing to say, much as paying children a quid a day to make shoes is a horrible thing to do.

“We simply cannot continue to associate with someone who behaves and speaks in an amoral manner” said Nike spokesperson, Simon Williams.

“Nike has a strict ethical code which clearly states that we must never associate with homophobes, although we are still absolutely fine with child labour.

“Our ethical code is an inconsistent document, I admit. It’s hard to keep up with how exactly we are supposed to be evil.

“Anyway, homophobia is wrong and oppressive and we can’t continue our relationship with Manny on that basis.

“But we will continue to oppress children by getting them to stitch our trainers together.

“…yes, this is really hard to make sound right, I’m struggling here.”

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