Thursday 11 February 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Jeremy Hunt confirms status as rhyming slang


Jeremy Hunt, Rhyming slang

Jeremy Hunt has confirmed his status as rhyming slang for the worst word in the world.

The complete and utter “Jeremy Hunt” has elected to impose upon junior doctors the kind of contract that would make anyone but the lowliest of sweatshop workers wince, seemingly unaware of the army of people who think it’s a terrible idea versus the literal one person who thinks it’s a good idea, namely him.

“He is a massive ‘Jeremy Hunt’, this one” confirmed Dr. Simon Williams.

“Only a thumping great ‘Jeremy Hunt’ like him would suggest that anyone should work more hours for less pay.

“Ask literally anyone if they would willingly work more for less and if any of them say “yes” then send them to me and I’ll prescribe them something ASAP.

“Or “stat”, if you want a medical term that nobody actually uses.”

Hospital patient, Elizabeth King, said “I suppose he is a bit of a ‘Jeremy Hunt’ really.”

“I mean I’m lying here with a dining fork stuck out of my abdomen with precisely fuck-all doctors currently around to take a look at it and even I think he’s being a ‘Jeremy Hunt’ about all of this.”

School children have apparently already taken to the new slang, with phrases such as “last one out of the locker room is a massive ‘Jeremy Hunt’!”

“I’m not sure if it’s better or worse than yelling ‘cunt’, to be honest,” shrugged Dr. Simon Williams.

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