Tuesday 2 February 2016 by DavyWavy

Get off my lawn, says Alan Moore


Alan Moore

Legendary comics creator Alan Moore has angrily ordered some disrespectful young scallywags off his lawn this morning.

Waving his stick and shouting incoherently, Moore appeared furious that the youngsters were on his lawn and planting their own flowers in his garden without so much as a by-your-leave.

Moore, who was regarded as one of the brightest lights in the comics world of the 1980s and 90s, has spent the last twenty years writing a succession of groundbreaking works such as I’m on your lawn, Your lawn is patriarchal and imperialistic and I’m going to do what I like with it,  I’m still on your lawn and you can’t stop me, and Fish-cult Funnies.

When met with the suggestion that other people are just treating his lawn the same as he regards other people’s Moore insisted that it was ‘completely different’.

“When I go onto other people’s lawns it’s to combat the misogynistic oppression of the herbacious border,” he told us.

“But when people do it to mine they’re trespassers and little better than thieves. There’s a world of difference.”

Latest reports indicate that people have offered to keep off Moore’s lawn if he uses to the time he spends shouting to write book 4 of Halo Jones instead, but that just led to a furious 114,000 word article about the nature of magick.

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