Friday 22 January 2016 by DavyWavy

Nobody at World Econonic Forum owning up to inviting Bono


Bono at Davos

Nobody at the World Economic Forum in Davos is owning up to inviting Bono.

The annual event is attended by economists, central bankers, academics and senior governmental figures, leaving nobody any the wiser as to how the U2 singer got in.

Bono has been reticent about showing his invitation, but reports suggest his pass has his name written on ‘in biro’.

When asked how he got in, Bono said he was ‘a mate of Steve’ and that ‘Steve said it’d be ok’ before heading back to the free champagne bar.

It is not known if Bono has made any meaningful contribution to policy discussions, but he has crashed some tremendously good parties.

“I was in conversation with my counterpart from the Chinese Central Bank about the effect of the BRICS nations loosening M2 money supply on structural unemployment when Bono just butted in and started crooning ‘In the name of love’ at us,” Bank of England representative Sinon Williams told us.

“He told us it was to raise awareness of bad things, but if you’d seen the numbers coming out of Shanghai recently you’d know we’re already well a-fucking-ware of those.

“Then he clutched my shoulder and said ‘We make our love on wasteland, yeah?’ in a really meaningful voice.

“God knows what that was about. I think he’d been drinking.”

Insiders suggest that Bono arrived at the event with Bill Clinton, but nobody knows who invited him either.

“At least you can rely on Clinton to bring girls and weed,” Simon Williams added.

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