Thursday 10 December 2015 by Waylandsmithy

Step ladder firm raided in crackdown on ‘legal highs’


Step Ladders

Ministers have denied that they are ‘out of touch’ with youth culture, after police raided a warehouse full of step ladders.

“When I read that legal highs were dangerous, I thought ‘well everyone knows that’,” said Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt.

“Without someone to foot the bottom step, a boy could easily fall on top of you.”

Following government instructions, police raided the premises and discovered equipment capable of elevating a youth ‘safely’ to 25 feet.

But what if they weighed more than 120 kilograms, or attempted to stand on the top step?

“These legal highs look fun, but when I tried one, I started to feel a bit light-headed,” explained police sergeant Brian Toxteth.

“And then I looked down, and immediately shat my pants.”

Toxteth had a pre-existing condition called ‘lilly liver’ which was aggravated by the ‘high’.

A video of the incident has been put on YouTube, to serve as a warning to those thinking of following in his footsteps, or buying his second-hand laundry basket.

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