Sunday 25 October 2015 by Spacey

Parents left frustrated as pre-schoolers struggle with concept of ‘extra hour in bed’


Children not sleeping in when clocks go back

Bleary-eyed parents have spent the morning watching an extra hour of kids’ TV after failing to convince their children it wasn’t time to get up.

Negotiations broke down shortly after 5am when it transpired that toddlers are too selfish to comprehend the preciousness of lovely, magical sleep.

“Bloody kids!” explained father-of-three Dan Chambers.

“Watching strange and colourful creatures dancing in front of my eyes at 6 in the morning used to be the result of taking magic mushrooms.”

“These days it’s the result of turning on CBeebies in the dark for a two-foot tall psychopath to prevent yet another violent meltdown that would wake the dead.”

“Bloody, bloody, bloody kids!”

30 year-old mother-of-twins Siobhan Masons has suffered similar anguish.

“How many times must I stumble into the bathroom and experience the realisation that the puddle I’ve just stood in is the piss of a wayward 4 year-old,” she sobbed.

“Why don’t they struggle with the clocks going forward?”

“Why?!”

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