Monday 14 September 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Experts baffled after sky refuses to fall despite Corbyn leadership win


Jeremy Corbyn Labour leader

Experts were left baffled today as despite Jeremy Corbyn winning the Labour leadership, the sky has still not fallen.

“It’s been nearly 48 hours,” said Political commentator Andrew Rawnsley.

“I was sure the sky would have fallen by now. I’ve been wearing a hardhat since Saturday lunchtime and I’d encourage everyone to do the same because it’s going to happen, there is literally no other outcome possible.”

Some of the Labour party’s finest minds and Liz Kendall had predicted apocalyptic scenarios if Jeremy Corbyn won, ranging from the Sky falling to the dead rising up from their graves and causing terrible traffic problems.

The direst prediction was of a return of Ed Miliband, but that really was from the more lunatic fringe of the party and most agreed that it wouldn’t really be anything worse than the end of the world.

The public remained unworried by the danger.

“Jeremy who?” Said unemployed hamster shaver, Simon Williams.

“The Labour what?” He continued, before slamming his toilet cubicle door.

However the science community remained watchful.

“I’ve been monitoring the sky since the announcement of Mr Corbyn’s leadership triumph,” said Sir Richard Race, Professor of Skies at Keele University.

“After all, Tony Blair himself predicted the sky would fall if Jeremy Corbyn won, and if you can’t believe the word of Tony Blair then I don’t know who you can believe.”

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