Monday 7 September 2015

We’re full and don’t have room for more henges, archaeologists told


New stone henge found

British archaeologists have been told the country is full and they should stop trying to find a place for more henges.

With the number of stone henges rising by 100% so far this year, many have said such a rate of discovery is unsustainable on such a small island.

Concerned voter Simon Williams told us, “I don’t know where they think all these henges are going to go?”

“The roads are too busy and you’ve got to stand on the trains as it is. What don’t these archaeologists understand about the country being full already?”

“We simply don’t have room for more neolithic structures. That’s not racist, that’s just a fact.”

“I’ll bet loads of my tax money will go on supporting these henges too, right? How is that even fair?”

“They should just stop looking for more henges before we get a reputation for being a soft-touch place for any henge looking to put down roots. Did you know henges don’t even speak English? It’s a disgrace.”

“If these archaeologists carry on like this it won’t be long before you won’t be able to walk down the street without bumping into a henge.”

“And that’s not the country I know. This is England, not Hengeland.”

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