Wednesday 26 August 2015 by Neil Tollfree

ISIS defeat old, empty building


ISis blow up palmyra temple in syria

ISIS have announced their glorious triumph over a really old, empty building.

“We have once again proven that old, empty buildings are no match for the might of ISIS,” said a spokesperson for the terror group yesterday.

The spokesperson was quick to refute claims that blowing up old, empty buildings was the futile act of people with the emotional maturity of a sulky adolescent.

“What! No! There is every reason for ISIS to blow up old, empty building. It was looking at us funny, well not it, but the people in it. Well, there was no people in it. But if there had been people in it then they could have looked at us funny.”

“So we blow it up.”

ISIS have stated that this sends out a warning to the West that old, empty buildings simply will not be tolerated.

“Old, empty buildings are the work of infidel devils and are definitely something that our holy scripture warn us against. It’s just somewhere at the back.”

“And we love blowing shit up.”

Other old, empty buildings around the world are said to be on high alert, with Athens Olympic facilities, my Dad’s old shed, and the toilets at the end of Cleethorpes pier at particular risk.

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