Wednesday 19 August 2015 by Lucas Wilde

World first as opposing parties ‘Agree to Disagree’ in online argument


online argument

Two men have broken new ground by peacefully accepting their opposing views after an online debate about immigration.

Simon Williams and Tom Vance voiced their points eloquently and backed up their arguments with meticulous research from the Office of National Statistics, as opposed to the usual ad hominem attacks combined with numbers plucked from the sky.

When it became clear an impasse had been reached, the two men wished each other the best and ended their conversation on good terms, with nobody questioning the sexual habits of the other’s mother or suggesting that the other might like to fuck off and die in a ditch.

“Why would I have got angry?” said Williams, “I was typing on a nice laptop, in a nice house, and the wife has promised me it’s ‘nookie night’ once Eastenders was finished.”

“I’m fully aware that I’ve got it good, and a petty disagreement on an online forum isn’t going to rob me of my sense of perspective.”

Vance said, “Mr. Williams conducted himself like a gentleman, and it was pleasure to debate with him.”

“Usually I would have suggested he was the product of a liaison between a pig and a whore, but a) I can’t prove that and b) how could I be cantankerous while enjoying a glass of pinot in the sunshine?”

The two men stopped short of sending each other friend requests.

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