Friday 7 August 2015 by Neil Tollfree

‘Great British Bake-Off’ to play ten nights at Wembley Stadium


british bake off

This years ‘Great British Bake-Off’ will culminate in a series of live shows over ten nights at Wembley Stadium playing to over a million people.

“We’re doing this for the fans,” said Mary Berry, as she sipped from a bottle of Cristal champagne.

“We had been looking to do a live event for a while, Glastonbury wanted us to replace Foo Fighters, but they’re not big enough for Bake-Off.”

“It could only be Wembley.”

There has been a clamour amongst some of the biggest acts in the world to secure a support slot with the Rolling Stones, Taylor Swift, and Prince all expected to feature over the ten nights, and Berry is thought to have personally requested NWA to reform for the final night.

“We don’t want to say too much,” said Paul Hollywood as he sucked on a huge Cuban cigar.

“But fans can expect an incredible lightshow, one of the most powerful sound systems ever invented and some really spectacular meringues.”

Although tickets don’t go on sale until October, fans have already started queueing.

“No, I literally have to have tickets,” said peculiar man Simon Williams.

“I love Bake-off more than my own children, so I will be getting tickets for all ten nights.”

“In fact, I’ll get two tickets for each night so I’ve got somewhere to put my bag. Oh god, I’m so excited.”

Rumours that the shows will feature Mary Berry doing a baked Alaska with a hologram of the late Keith Floyd remain unconfirmed.

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