Friday 31 July 2015 by DavyWavy

We’ll keep punching sharks until they get the message, say Australians


Shark punched

Australians have pledged to continue punching sharks until they get the message.

Angered that sharks appear incapable of taking a blooming hint, surfers have vowed to keep smacking the crap out of them until they bugger off back to Sharko-land, or wherever it is they come from.

Reports indicate that some surfers have taken to catching a wave whilst holding a cricket bat in the hope of getting a good swing in.

“Come over here and we’ll bloody have ya, ya big toothy bastard”, we were told by a government spokesman.

“Bloody sharks, coming over here, taking all our surfing beaches.”

“Who do they think they are? Sharks acting like they own the bloody sea.”

The Australian government has promised to look into the number of aggressive, homeless sharks showing up at popular beaches and deport them if necessary. Possibly to New Zealand for a laugh.

The spokesman went on to explain that standing up to the shark menace was a testament to Australian prowess in the physical realm.

When we asked about the ashes match at Edgbaston we were told to ‘fuck off you pommie bastard.’

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