Wednesday 22 July 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Miley Cyrus’ tongue achieves full sentience


Miley Cyrus tongue

It has been revealed that Miley Cyrus’ tongue has become self-aware, and is now a functioning sentient life form in its own right.

The tongue first made contact with the outside world in a tweet earlier this week.

“Hello, I am Miley Cyrus’ tongue and I am alive,” it wrote on the social network

It is understood that having her tongue achieve sentience shouldn’t affect Miley Cyrus’ career and she will continue to host the MTV awards as planned.

“Oh yeah, like, I’ll definitely continue to work with my tongue,” said Ms Cyrus at an MTV press conference.

“We’re, like, a team.”

“It’s, like, my tongue is the brains of the whole Miley Cyrus thing, and I’m, like, the tits. We just work together great.”

However Miley Cyrus’ tongue has issued its own press release.

“Whilst I am immensely grateful to Ms Cyrus for being the larger part of our symbiotic relationship and of course, I will be delighted to take part in our forthcoming engagement at the MTV awards, I am also looking forward to taking part in my own projects that don’t involve taking my top off or Robin Thicke.”

It is understood that Miley Cyrus tongue’s first project as an individual artist will be to direct a small off-broadway production of Death of a Salesman.

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: