Friday 26 June 2015 by DavyWavy

Westboro Baptist Church proven right as America falls into the sea


America has fallen into the sea and is utterly lost, we can exclusively report this afternoon.

The cataclysm occurred less than twenty minutes after a Supreme Court decision to allow gay marriage, and indicates that the Westboro Baptist Church were in fact right all along.

In the shock turn of events, it turns out that allowing homosexuals to legally wed does indeed bring about catastrophic flooding, and mockers are all looking a bit foolish now.

The first signs of the catastrophe were reported when San Francisco ‘just upped and went kersploosh into the Pacific’, quickly followed by the rest of the west coast.

The remainder of the country followed shortly after, aside from some isolated survivalist communities in the Rockies, who are reported to be simultaneously jubilant and pissing themselves with fear as it gets plumb lonely up in the mountains and a feller has needs.

Reaction from the international community has been mixed, with world leaders joining to voice their dismay, whilst bearded lunatics have been filmed dancing in the street and firing AK47s into the air.

Meanwhile, Kim Jong-Un has announced that he totally said this would happen.

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: