Wednesday 24 June 2015 by Tom Whalley

Confederate flag protest sees Duke Of Hazzard forced to borrow wife’s Nissan Micra


Dukes of Hazzard confederate flag

The US confederate flag protest has now reached Hazzard County, making life difficult for cousins Luke and Bo Duke.

As protests spread across the USA, pressure is mounting to withdraw the Confederate battle flag, with retailers eBay and Amazon both now refusing to sell the flag.

The retailers stance has been praised despite the fact that you can still buy ‘rasta hats’ with fake dreadlocks, on both sites.

However the protest has caused unforeseen issues for the Hazzard cousins.

As Bo told us, “We stumbled upon Boss Hogg’s latest scheme to acquire our family farm.”

“We were about to foil him by driving around really fast in the General Lee, and doing a stunt where we jumped over a river.”

“Unfortunately we were thwarted by a group of protesters unhappy with the roof of our car now and we’ve now had to move into an apartment in town.”

Protesters claim that the Dukes’ car, named after a Confederate General who opposed giving freed slaves the vote, and with a massive Confederate flag on the roof, is a bit offensive to everyone who is not completely awful.

The Dukes have been forced to take drastic measures.

“Both Luke and I are having to use my wife’s Nissan Micra.”

“It’s a great little runabout for her but it’s not ideally suited to outrunning the police when we’re trying to smuggle moonshine across county lines.”

“Also my wife needs it to get to spin class on a Tuesday and Thursday so Boss Hogg can just do what he likes on those days and there’s no one to stop him.”

Despite being forced into using the car, those crazy Dukes are still making a political statement.

“The previous owner left a sticker in the back window that says ‘give cyclists room’.”

“Take that Washington.”

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