Wednesday 13 May 2015 by DavyWavy

Legalise Cannabis Party finally responds to election result


Legalise Cannabis party small

Britain’s Legalise Cannabis Party has finally responded to the election result, six days after polls closed.

The Cannabis is Safer than Alcohol party, which ran candidates in 32 constituencies, was formed to fight for the legalisation of cannabis when they remember to do so.

Having woken this morning to the news that the election is actually over, a party spokesman said they were ‘badly bummed out’ by only polling 6,000 votes across the country, although they did point out that was still more than the BNP.

“This is like, wow, man,” said the spokesman.

“It’s just totally… You say the election is over? A week ago? When did that happen?”

“I was just…just…yeah.”

“Have any of you guys got anything to eat?”

“Jesus, my head.”

Upon being informed that every one of their candidates had lost their deposit, our contact put his head in his hands and said “We’ve blown the stash? Whoa.”

Despite polling badly, Cannabis is Safer than Alcohol are planning a post-election party which they expect several hundred thousand people to attend.

“Yeah, it’s called Glastonbury,” concluded the spokesperson.

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