Tuesday 17 March 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Prince Harry to take over as Sunderland manager


Prince Harry sunderland manager

Speculation is rife that Prince Harry is leaving the Army in order to take over at Sunderland AFC.

“It seems the obvious narrative,” says journalist and fan Simon Williams.

“Gus Poyet has been sacked, Dick Advocaat is appointed an interim manager, and Prince Harry leaves the army in June.”

“The only way you can read this is that Prince Harry will be installed in time for the transfer window.”

The young Prince, famous for being photographed with his plums out in a Las Vegas hotel, will face a tough time at Sunderland with many people believing he’ll start his tenure in the Championship.

“Oh yes,” said Williams, “Sunderland are a total sack of wank.”

Prince Harry at Sunderland

The Royals have, for a long time, wanted to get into football management.

Prince Andrew was expected to take over at Wimbledon FC in the early nineties but unfortunately was far too busy shagging to do so.

Prince Harry has been linked with numerous jobs since announcing his intention to break from the Army; presenter of Top Gear, UKIP councillor, and manager of the Brentwood station branch of WH Smith.

“Look, I can’t say anything,” said Sunderland board member Ellis Short.

“Would we like to have Prince Harry at the club? Course we would. He’s a big name and he’s got lovely hair. But we’ll have to wait and see.”

The expected move for Prince Harry has fuelled speculation that the Royal Family will offer Gus Poyet a job as a minor royal.

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