Monday 16 March 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Russia’s new Putin-bot reveals terrifying new advances in robotic technology


Vladimir Putin

Today’s revelation that Russia has created a new robotic President Putin has left the West stunned at how far advanced their robotic technology is.

“It almost looks completely human,” said robotics expert Doctor Michael Chowney.

“Which is incredible as President Putin himself almost looks completely human, so the likeness is uncanny.”

The Putin-bot made its first public appearance earlier today at a meeting with Kyrgyzstan President Almazbek Atambayev in St Petersburg.

At first it was assumed that President Putin had reappeared after his ten day disappearance, but as the meeting progressed and President Putin neither exposed his nipples or slayed a wild beast, the truth became clear; it was a robotic President Putin.

“The implications of the Putin-bot are alarming,” continued Doctor Chowney.

“We could be seeing the beginning of a Putin-era Russia that lasts until the end of time, or until the batteries run out anyway.”

“Or perhaps an army of Robo-Putins, stripped to the waist, riding bears and marching on the Caucuses.”

The West has tried to create a robotic President after George W. Bush accidentally killed himself midway early in his second term whilst attempting to put on some shoes, but the robot had poor language and problem-solving skills and was ultimately considered an unconvincing President.

No one noticed the difference.

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