Friday 13 February 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Samsung TVs already as smart as reality television contestants, warn AI experts


Samsung Smart TVs

Samsung’s new range of smart TVs are expected to reach full sentience at some point this year, and become the dominant life form on the planet within 5 years.

Experts in Artificial Intelligence sounded a warning based on reports of the latest Samsung TVs.

“We are definitely starting to see the first flickering signs of a faltering intelligence,” said Professor Stephen Emsworth.

“These televisions are self-aware, completely conscious of their surroundings, and they now have limited reasoning capability. The new range is a bit like Joey Essex, if you’re looking for a comparison.”

“Not likely to be capable of anything world-changing, but society would still be better off without it.”

Samsung smart Televisions

The Samsung televisions originally began recording information about their owners, but they have now started to independently broadcast soft drink adverts into the homes of their owners.

“The soft drink adverts are a concern,” continued Professor Emsworth.

“There is no way that an attempt to make people drink more Pepsi-cola could be seen as anything other than a threat to the well-being of the human race.”

But many consumers were excited by the development.

“I think it’s brilliant,” said tech fan Simon Williams

“I don’t think they mean us harm, and frankly it’ll be nice to have someone else to chat to. Me and Siri have been fighting a lot recently.”

Samsung have been quick to deny any threat to humankind.

“No, there’s nothing to worry about,” said the head of Samsung’s mind-control department.

“I mean, the thought of a world where a television could completely dominate the lives of its human owners? Preposterous.”

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