Tuesday 20 January 2015 by Laura Hyde

Colleges to offer free short courses in ‘Decoding Political Bullshit’


decoding political bullshit

With just under four months to go before the 2015 General Election, colleges across the country are targeting voters keen to understand anything that comes out of an electoral candidate’s mouth.

With languages already a popular subject, many educational establishments believe teaching people the nuances of political double-speak could prove lucrative.

Professor Iain McLean, a politics lecturer at Oxford said, “You might be surprised to learn that a lot of people actually fall for the ridiculous rhetoric they read in the tabloids.”

“I think it’s vital for the future of our country that people realise that just because most politicians don’t wear grossly oversized shoes, it doesn’t mean they’re not a complete clown.”

Simon Caney, The Director of Oxford University’s Centre for the Study of Social Justice added, “Staff at top UK universities feel particularly bad because we taught a lot of these people.”

“With the benefit of hindsight we clearly unleashed them on the world without giving the general public the tools to decipher the copious amount of bullshit that many politicians feel the need to spread.”

Politician bullshit

In an attempt to address this pressing issue, Oxford University have rolled out a special short course titled ‘Decoding Political Bullshit’ to be taught in all secondary schools, colleges and universities across the country.

They admit it’s their fault that teachers have had so many training days over the past eighteen months, saying “sorry, it was crucial.”

The course, which will be free to the general public, contains modules such as Avoiding Difficult Questions, Using Jargon Even They Don’t Understand, Impossible Promises, and Jedi Mind Control.

The course is expected to be available from the start of February until the end of April.

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