Monday 19 January 2015 by Neil Tollfree

Previous Labour government to blame for cold weather, insists Osborne


Osborne blames Labour

George Osborne claimed yesterday that the current cold weather is as a direct result of mismanagement from the previous Labour Government.

“Today’s cold weather is just one more example of the legacy of a profligate and incompetent Government,” he said on the Andrew Marr show.

“Like the failed economy, the broken NHS, the lack of any good young British tennis players breaking through, and the three shit Star Wars films; it’s all Labour’s fault.”

Many people consider the weather to be part of a global meteorological system of interconnected atmospheric conditions, but according to Mr Osborne ‘that’s just stupid, it’s definitely Labour’s fault.’

Labour’s fault

Mr Osborne’s views seemed to resonate with the public.

“Yeah, I mean, I think he’s got a point,” said village idiot Simon Williams.

“I don’t think we can really trust the Labour Government with our weather. I mean, yes, it was really hot in 2002 but I remember the last few years under Brown, we had really cold and grey summers. It was rubbish.”

“What I think is important to stress,” continued Mr Osborne, “Is that everything that is awful – the weather, wasps, traffic jams, is Labour’s fault.”

“And everything that’s good – ice cream, puppies, pretty girls – is because of the Tory Government.

After the interview, as Mr Osborne left the BBC studios, he tripped and stubbed his toe.

“That was Labour’s fault as well,” he concluded.

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