Monday 5 January 2015 by Tom Ana

Bicycle that broke Bono’s arm given New Year Honour


Bono bicycle accident

The bicycle that broke U2 frontman Bono’s arm in 2014 has been awarded an MBE after it was revealed this week that the 54 year-old may never play guitar again.

The bicycle, a Holborn Racer 440, was awarded the prestigious honour for ‘services to musical taste’ in a last-minute ceremony held earlier today.

Family of the bicycle expressed their immense pride at news of the honour, which they claim was completely unexpected.

“It’s such an honour to see a member of the family recognised in this way”, said R. Chopper, the bicycle’s father.

“We never thought he’d ever achieve anything really, not with him being a bike and everything.”

“But to see him make such a positive contribution to world around him gives such a huge sense of pride for me and his mum.”

Bono will never play guitar again

Musical experts said that the bicycle was only awarded an MBE because technically Bono can still sing.

“If it has managed to damage him vocal chords then we’re in ‘Knighthood’ territory,” explained Simon Williams, and expert in the Commonwealth honours system.

Fans have the band have been reassured following news of their singer’s recent injury with the announcement that a 97-hour recording of Bono undergoing physical therapy would automatically be downloaded to all iTunes enabled devices by Friday.

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