Tuesday 18 November 2014 by Juliet Brando

I’m a Celebrity producers to introduce deadly ‘driver ants’


I'm a celebrity driver ants

I’m a Celebrity producers are to level the playing field in this season’s ‘bushtucker trials’ by introducing bugs that eat you back.

The popular ITV show is now into its 14th series, and producers have struggled to keep ratings high, especially after criticism from the RSPCA and other animal welfare organisations.

Just this week, Chris Packham appealed to Ant and Dec in an open letter.

The Springwatch star has previously highlighted animal exploitation on the show and he pointed out that dangerous creatures have their “fangs sealed” or “jaws bound”.

“That definitely gave the human participants an unfair advantage,” nodded producer Jez Carbunkle.

“Why not flog, birch, tar and feather or hang draw and quarter the contestants as well?” Packham told The Mirror in 2012.

“After all these practices date from the same periods when animal-baiting was popular entertainment.”

I’m a Celebrity changes

Jez Carbunkle agreed and invited viewers to suggest ways of mentally and physically torturing TOWIE’s Gemma Collins.

This week, a surprise colony of 50,000 African driver ants is due to be introduced into the camp after a vote on Twitter.

“She said she wanted to slim down,” laughed the producer. “These guys just leave behind skeleton and cartilage!”

Driver ants are the only insects known to kill and rapidly consume large mammals, and they appear in Hollywood hits such as Charlton Heston’s “The Naked Jungle”, and “Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skulls”.

Contrary to popular belief, the ants don’t eat their victims alive, but asphyxiate their meal by swarming its airways and clogging its lungs.

“We’ll put them in while she’s asleep,” Carbunkle snorted, urinating over his shoes.

“The lawyers say we’ve got a duty of care or something, but the viewers voted against that, so Gemma Collins is getting ants in her pants! Keep watching, everyone!”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: