Monday 10 November 2014

First human captured on camera clearly pulling ‘duckface’


Duckface photograph

A rare photograph believed to be the first ever capturing a human being, clearly shows the featured person pulling the ‘duckface’.

The photo was taken in 1838 in Paris, and clearly shows a teenage girl puckering for a camera that is about 400 yards away.

Historical anthropologist Simon Williams explained, “We previously thought duckface was something that evolved in the age of the selfie – but this photo changes everything, clearly we were wrong.”

“It seems that duckface is an inherent human instinct that pre-dates mobile phones and selfies, and even cameras themselves.”

“We now believe that had cavemen had the necessary artistic ability, their crude cave-wall drawings would have contained more duckface.”

“It’s also been suggested that an x-ray on the Mona Lisa shows that the original actually had more duckface.”

Duckface

Teenagers have reacted with shock to the news, claiming that old people shouldn’t be doing duckface.

“They’re well jel, innit,” mumbled one incoherent teenage girl that we estimate to be about fifteen.

Photographers have said that the duckface instinct might have been there all along, but cameras have brought it out into the open.

“It’s like the cats sitting in a drawn circle thing – we’ve stumbled across it by accident, and they can’t stop doing it, but photos of it are funny only the first few times you see it.”

“I can only assume that millions of years ago there was an evolutionary advantage to female humans attracting male ducks, because I’ve yet to meet a man who finds it attractive.”

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