Friday 3 October 2014

UK and Argentina reach agreement to ‘give back’ Top Gear presenters


The UK has agreed to give the presenters of Top Gear back to Argentina, in a bid to restore goodwill between the two countries.

The Top Gear team fled the country after being pelted by stones for driving a car with a number plate that referred to the 1982 Falklands conflict, but are soon to be returned after the two countries reached agreement.

Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and the other one are currently in a military plane en route to Buenos Aires after the two countries put pen to paper on the terms of their extradition.

A spokesperson for the Home Office explained, “Complex extradition orders and international diplomatic issues such as this can often take months if not years to resolve, but this whole deal was concluded very quickly indeed.”

“Argentina said ‘we’d like to string them up by their testicles in a public setting’ and we said ‘OK, do you need any more string?’.”

“It is a win-win arrangement to be fair. They get to string some people up and pacify their voters, and we get rid of the Top Gear presenters – what’s not to like about the deal?”

Top Gear in Argentina

The BBC show has so far refused to comment officially on the whereabouts of its presenters, though one show insider explained they were heading back to Argentina.

They told us, “They landed and were busy telling everyone how funny they are when some people from the government came in and put a sack over Jeremy Clarkson’s head.”

“Apparently it’s not necessary, they just don’t particularly like Jeremy’s face.”

“The officials apologised to us, but said a fall in BBC ratings would be well worth it if this stops Argentina going on about the Falklands for a couple of years.”

“Oh, and we’ve got the exclusive rights to any public flogging they might receive – which is nice.”

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