Monday 29 September 2014 by Gary Stanton

Racist clown defects to rival circus


UKIP Defection Clown

The defection of one of his clowns to a rival circus has left Big Top owner Davey Cameroni with a big sad face this morning.

Cameroni has slammed the defection of lead clown Giuseppe Grimaldi to Nigello Faragoni’s Rightwing Circus as ‘senseless and counter-productive’.

Multi-talented clown Grimaldi stormed out of an afternoon performance at Cameroni’s Big Top after throwing a bucket of water in his leader’s face that later turned out to be confetti.

The embittered fool then jumped into his car, sounded the horn, and made a swift exit, but didn’t get very far before the wheels fell off.

Grimaldi, 42, insists Cameroni’s decision to employ clown labour from Eastern Europe and sub-Saharan Africa has driven down his wages and put unnecessary pressure on local services.

“They come over here with their inferior rubber chickens and non-indigenous squirting flowers and expect to jump the queue,”he fumed.

“It’s a joke and not a very funny one.”

“Not to mention – every time one of them falls over in a comedic fashion, which is quite often, they expect the NHS to pick up the pieces.”

Clown defection

Grimaldi says he’s just one of a growing number of disgruntled clowns and that many other may follow suit.

“I tried explaining how I felt to Mr Cameroni using the medium of mime, but he just doesn’t get it,” he added.

Last night Cameroni admitted Grimaldi’s departure had come as a huge shock – quiet literally when the pair shook hands.

“I can’t believe I fell for that one again!” Cameroni groaned.

“Joking aside, I just don’t know how I’m going to fill his shoes,” he sighed.

“Have you seen them? They’re fucking massive.”

Meanwhile Grimaldi says his decision to quit is final.

“I’m not racist, but I’m far more comfortable in a circus where all the clowns have white faces,” he concluded.

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