Monday 16 December 2013

Public sympathy for Tottenham’s Daniel Levy holding steady at 0%


The football supporting public has said that its sympathy for a chairman who spent £100m before sacking the manager four months later is holding steady at absolutely zero.

After sacking manager Andres Villas-boas after yesterday’s home defeat to Liverpool, football fans outside of White Hart Lane have insisted they literally could not be less bothered by the issues facing Daniel Levy.

“Sure, I’ll bet spending £100m on players and finding yourself in lowly 7th place is desperately upsetting for Daniel Levy – it’s just that frankly I would struggle to give less of a shit.”

“I’m sure that in a world of millionaires kicking a bag of air around a field he was ‘left with no choice’, but all I see is a spoiled man-child spitting his dummy out because the other mega-rich people won’t let his team win.”

“But what he has done in sacking a manager with the highest win percentage of any Tottenham manager in a hundred years is ensure any football-loving fan across the nation will revel in their misfortune for at least a couple of years.”

AVB sacked by Tottenham

Fans of the club have expressed disappointment at the way the season has gone, given the promises from the chairman just a couple of months ago.

Season ticket holder Shane Goldberg told us, “When Daniel Levy said he would turn Spurs in a club like Chelsea, we thought he meant on the pitch – not the boardroom.”

“But I suppose we’ve got start somewhere. Maybe John Terry could start screwing a few of our players partners?”

“I’ll give Levy the benefit of the doubt, as if there’s one thing football has taught us in the premier league era, it’s that repeatedly changing your manager on the chairman’s whim is a sure-fire recipe for success.”

One the search for a new manager, Goldberg concluded, “Well I hear Harry Redknapp is looking for a way back into the Premier League?”

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