Monday 25 November 2013

People still surprised by banks acting like complete shits


Banks screwing people over to make more money is still a surprising development to some people, according to a survey this morning.

As RBS was accused of potentially forcing businesses to collapse in order to snap up cheap assets and make more money, many reading the story reacted as if they had never heard of the UK’s banking system.

Business Secretary Vince Cable has sent a report into how RBS dealt with some small firms to City regulators, in which he reveals that banks would happily murder you in your sleep if it would increase profits by a penny.

Financial analyst Simon Williams, “It’s best to think of the banks like sociopathic serial killers.”

“They will happily smile at your face whilst secretly fantasizing about ripping out your still beating heart.  As long as there is a profit in it, obviously.”

“In this day and age I’m frankly stunned that anyone would be surprised at anything a bank did to make a bit more money.”

“Imagine the worst possible thing you could ever do to someone – a banker would do that for a fiver.”

RBS conduct reported

Some bank customers have expressed sadness that the banks appear to be slipping back into what they seem to believe are their ‘old ways’.

Bank customer Sheila Matthews told us, “They said it would be different this time, they promised me and said they’d get help so they wouldn’t treat us like this any more.”

“They said they knew that what they did was wrong, and that it would never happen again.”

“I looked into their eyes, as they pleaded with me, and I’m ashamed to say that I believed them.”

“I feel such a fool.”

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