Wednesday 17 July 2013

Hot weather stories now officially as tedious as cold weather stories


Tales of how hot it has been are now officially as tedious as tales of how cold it was during the winter, according to reports.

Reports are emerging of incredibly boring repetitive conversations striking up across the nation, with widespread outbreaks entirely predictable social media commentary.

Simon Williams told us, “Like anything new, hot weather stories hold a certain interest for a short period of time.”

“That time expires when I hear for the third time how someone couldn’t sleep last night because it was so hot.”

“I didn’t think it was possible to hear a more tedious story than the one about Maureen in accounts not being able to get to work because of the snow – but the one about Maureen’s faulty fan leaving her bedroom unbearably hot really does top the lot.”

“It’s like she’s just a very boring person and all she can talk about is the weather. Strange, isn’t it?”

Heat wave

Facebook has responded to complaints that a new bug is filling the newsfeeds of UK users with updates that make their friends seem like weather obsessed morons incapable of coping with a bit of heat.

A spokesperson said, “No, that’s not a bug, your social circle really is capable of producing banality at such high quantities.”

“Our suggestion? Get new friends, or avoid Facebook until it cools down a bit.”

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