Tuesday 18 June 2013 by Spacey

Children to advise parents on how to unblock porn filters


Web porn filter proposals

After Ministers made further calls for web firms to impose parental filters as a default setting, dads everywhere have begun enlisting the help of their tech savvy children to show them how to unblock online filth.

With most men unsure of the purpose of computers if you take porn away, fathers have expressed concerns that a failure to navigate filters will leave them with nothing but some expensive plastic with letters on.

“What else do these computers do?” asked worried father of three John Hutchins.

“To be honest, I didn’t even know it was called a computer.

“I bought it off a mate who sold it to me as an electric sex shed.”

Experts have also warned the introduction of web filters is leading to a complete change in the relationship between fathers and sons when compared to 30 years ago.

Filth historian and renowned lesbologist Dr Friedrich Numan, said, “Back in the 80s these men would have been reliant on their fathers leaving fanny mags on the top of a wardrobe or in the shed.

“Now we may find that they have to rely on their teenage sons to gain access to such material.”

“This generation of fathers are in danger of becoming a lost generation of filth enthusiasts.”

Porn filter proposals

Luke Kingsley from Hull was amongst thousands of men concerned that they may have to return to the days of buying a jazz mag that they’ve slipped inside a copy of Motorcyclist News.

“I don’t even own a motorbike,” he told us.

“I’ll be reduced to keeping a close eye on the contents of hedgerows in the hope of finding an abandoned porn mag.

I actually felt a flutter of excitement the other day when I spotted a discarded magazine in a motorway lay by.

“The government really is dragging us back to the eighties.”

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