Monday 15 April 2013 by Formelia Alberthine

Anne Frank would have been a One Direction fan, outraged Cowell tells Justin Bieber


Simon Cowell has responded with outrage to Justin Bieber’s suggestion that Anne Frank would have been a Belieber by insisting she would have been a fan of boyband, One Direction.

The X-Factor supremo said he was filled with contemptuous hatred for a being that could suggest a young victim of the Nazis would have proffered her attentions on one gyrating schoolboy when she could focus on five of them instead.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but Justin Bieber wasn’t even voted into stardom by millions of morons eager to line the gargantuan depths of my pockets, he did it the old school way of being talent spotted,” a bitter Cowell told reporters.

“Now, knowing as little about Anne as I do, I am certain being kept under the stairs for a sustained period of time would have affected her ability to come to a rational decision on which pop star she liked most.”

“And that’s where Britain’s most celebrated kiddy botherer’s, One Direction, would have come into their own.”

“There’s not a cat in hells chance she would have favoured a Canadian.”

Anne Frank One Direction fan

Bieber has reportedly responded to Cowell’s protestations by paying a well known street artist to graffiti his image on the front of the Anne Frank museum in Amsterdam.

His PR assistant, Sheila Mount, confirmed the image was a peace offering.

“Justin wanted to let the ‘Frankette’s’ know he was on their side and what better way from getting her out from under the stairs than having thousands of Beliebers screeching at Justin’s image night and day?”

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