Friday 12 April 2013

It’s not censorship of the arts unless we say it is, insist BBC


We live in a society in which it is OK for the government choose which music people can listen to, it emerged this afternoon.

In a move that the BBC has been quick to describe as ‘definitely not censorship’, a decision has been taken censor a happy song from a seventy year-old musical in this week’s Top 40 chart.

Music fan Simon Williams told us, “I’ve not heard the song, but I assume it’s got some horrendous lyrics full of foul language intent on inciting racial hatred?”

“No, well what about graphic descriptions of violent sex acts or bestiality?”

“Ah, it must promote terrorism or attack the prophet Mohammed, that’s it, isn’t it?” he continued.

Ding Dong The Witch is Dead

The BBC has defended its decision not to play the song, insisting that Judy Garland is offensive to everyone who hasn’t bought the single.

Radio Controller Ben Cooper told reporters, “People will point to the 28,000 people who have bought the single, but I would point to the 60-odd million who haven’t, and who almost certainly agree with us that this track is an abomination.”

“We here at the BBC and within the government always know what is best for you the public, and as such you should in no way be concerned by the precedent we have set here in deciding what you can, and can not, hear.”

Simon Williams finally gave up guessing and let us tell him about the song, before replying, “What, it’s from a musical and is sung by Judy Garland?”

“Well, this is all a little bit ridiculous, then isn’t it.”

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