Tuesday 2 April 2013

I thought you meant 53 pounds of pheasant, admits Iain Duncan-Smith


Work and Pensions minister Iain Duncan-Smith has this morning reiterated his belief that it is easy to live on 53 pounds of freshly caught game bird a week.

When questioned over the weekend over recent benefits cuts, and asked how he would live of 53 pounds a week, Duncan-Smith said it would mostly be roasted on a bed of fragrant herbs, but he would probably have a few game pies to ‘mix it up a bit’.

“Frankly the poor are being rather greedy,” he told the Telegraph.

“Who needs 53 pounds of deliciously succulent gamey meat in a week? I could get by on half of that, as long there is plenty of tender-stem broccoli and other selected greens available.”

“Seriously, they’re not even trying.”

Duncan Smith on 53 pounds

Dietary experts have said that Duncan-Smith is quite correct, and 53 pounds of meat is more than enough for anyone in a single week.

Dietician Simon Williams explained, “That’s over 7 pounds of meat a day, which is quite a lot more than we’d recommend, unless you’re a competitive body builder, or Eric Pickles.”

“But if that’s what he said you can live on, then he’s technically right. Though it would not be so much Man vs Food, as Man vs ridiculously rich aristocratic diet.”

“Oh, sorry, you meant can you live on 53 pounds in pounds sterling a week? Oh no, in that case you’re fucked.”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: