Thursday 7 March 2013 by Waylandsmithy

George Galloway starts campaign for Venezuelan Presidency


Evergreen opportunist George Galloway has expressed his ‘deep admiration’ for the recently deceased Hugo Chavez, in a phone call from the first flight to Caracas.

During the call, Galloway said that Chavez had been a ‘one-off’ and would be very difficult to replace, with anyone other than himself.

Galloway has been a vocal supporter of the Venezuelan president, ever since he found out he was ill.

Regularly photographed outside the presidential palace or being escorted away by security guards, Galloway claims he can ‘easily identify’ the country on a map.

“The Venusians and I have a lot in common”, declared Galloway in a statement.

“We are indefatigable, we are proud, we are a located somewhere between Paraquat, Colombo and French Guy Arnie.”

Galloway Venezuelan campaign

Galloway spoke of his people’s struggle against tyranny and oppression, and promised to set up a trade agreement with the neighbouring Kardashians.

“When I think of my time serving as MP for Bedford North, I realise I’m too good for them, and deserve to run a whole country”, his statement read.

“I have always felt an affinity with your hatred of Americans and Capitalism, and I also look good in one of your white wicker hats.”

Galloway is confident he can build a swell of support from his people, who probably like to wear those sort of blanket things, and are sometimes seen standing near donkeys.

“I don’t like to blow my own trumpet”, said Galloway. “But I’d be perfect as the mouth piece of Vuvuzela.”

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