Thursday 10 January 2013 by Waylandsmithy

North Korea mulls addition of second page to internet


Officials behind North Korea’s glorious internet are considering adding a second page.

Only a brilliant country with a God-like leader could contemplate expanding their IT infrastructure by 100% overnight, even if the new page is quite similar to the first.

North Koreans seeking to better themselves through carefully managed online knowledge are currently enlightening by a portrait of Kim Jong-un, gazing imperiously to his left.

The breathtaking image is captioned ‘the font of all knowledge’, reassuring citizens that they are in good hands.

The proposed second page will build on this already-thorough database, with another portrait of Kim Jong-un staring wisely to his right.

North Korea’s Internet

North Korea has attempted to launch a new page before, which was a huge success despite it crashing.

The latest update was coded by Kim Jong-un himself, while riding a unicorn and smoking a cigarette.

Running dogs in the west have praised the openness of North Korea’s internet, particularly their policy on cookies, which are easy to opt out of.

“We have no need of such intrusive technology”, explained the First Marshall of the Internet.

“We already know precisely where you are, and what you are doing.”

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