Monday 22 October 2012 by Gary Stanton

Global racism to be eradicated by everyone wearing No To Racism t-shirts


The ongoing problem of global racism could be solved by more people wearing anti-racism t-shirts, according to people who supply anti-racism -shirts.

T-shirts are the primary weapon against racism, according to anti-racism groups, and their promotion should extend to all walks of life.

The latest findings have been welcomed by football fans everywhere after a row between Alex Ferguson and Rio Ferdinand threatened to degenerate into unpleasant name-calling.

A fuming Ferguson publicly questioned Ferdinand’s intelligence after the player’s refusal to wear a Kick Racism Out t-shirt, and insisted the player would be directly at fault if there is any racism going on anywhere today.

Ferguson told reporters, “The boy should know better. Without this message on his t-shirt people will think he’s supporting racism, obviously.”

No to racism

Aryan supremacists have admitted the t-shirts are so effective in combating their ideology that their goal of seeing Ron Atkinson in a primetime slot on Radio Five Live may have to wait until November 2018.

Reformed racist and Millwall fan, Simon Williams, said “The racial awareness t-shirts really helped me to see the error of my ways.”

“I’d never really thought of racism being a bad thing before. But then I saw a No To Racism t-shirt and ‘bam!’ – it just made sense.”

“However, since fewer players wore the t-shirts last Saturday I’m wondering if it’s OK to start being racist again?”

“I mean, if I can’t trust my morality to the t-shirts worn by footballers, how else will I decide what’s right or wrong?”

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