Wednesday 17 October 2012 by Formelia Alberthine

Belief in creationism ‘form of mental illness’


Fostering a belligerent belief in the fundamental tenets of Creationism often forms a large part of the profile of a person suffering from mental illness, according to Swedish researchers.

Creationism, which is the religious belief that the universe and its associated living organisms originate from a divine, Ikea style self-assembly production line maintained by a bearded sky nymph, dispute the findings of Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution.

The researchers claim believers in Creationism had a higher risk of developing the divinely assembled joys of anxiety and bipolar disorder, as well as schizophrenia.

Creationists insist this results from a part repeatedly found to be missing from one of God’s favourite flat pack lines.

Creationists mentally ill

‘Currently off her meds’ believer Mary Spout welcomed the Swedish researchers’ findings, despite their apparent conflict with her own mental illness.

“I just can’t understand those who doubt we are the direct result of some Ikea flat-pack style assembly,” she told us.

“In addition, I can totally understand those who doubt we are the direct result of some Ikea flat-pack style assembly.”

“Look, if He wanted to make me believe something like evolution he wouldn’t have made me a borderline simpleton with mental health issues, wouldn’t he?”

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