Wednesday 12 September 2012 by Spacey

Scotland happy for football team to be called British


Following their national side’s performance in last night’s game against Macedonia, Scotland has revealed it would be happy for their football team to be referred to as British.

Scotland have drawn the first two games of their World Cup qualifying campaign, and their chances of making it to Rio in 2014 are already looking slimmer than Victoria Beckham trapped in a sauna.

Despite Sean Connery’s insistence that Andy Murray should only be referred to as Scottish, the actor was more relaxed about his country’s footballers.

“I think we should maybe take a shared responsibility when it comes to football,” he said.

“Just because our successes are Scottish, it doesn’t mean our failures can’t be British.”

“Isn’t that what the Union is all about?”

British team draws with Macedonia

Followers of the Scottish national side are also keen for the embarrassment associated with their footballers attempts at competitive football to be shared throughout the British Isles.

“It doesn’t seem fair that our successful athletes are called British, but Scotland’s football team are called Scottish,” said 32 year-old David Cardney.

“We always get a raw deal when it comes to being able to take pride in our success or shamed for our failures.”

“I mean, when was the last time anyone described the Krankies as British?”

Under-fire Scotland manager Craig Levein insisted that he always tries to limit the damage to Scotland’s reputation when he’s picking his squad.

“For a start, I don’t pick any Scottish strikers,” he said.

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