Monday 20 August 2012 by Spacey

Bottle of piss steals show at V Festival


A bottle of piss has given one of the all-time great music festival performances after it joined Cher Lloyd on stage at high speed during the V Festival in Chelmsford yesterday.

The bottle of piss received a rapturous reception from the audience as it hurtled towards the stage before delivering one of it’s greatest hits.

Witnesses to the performance have hailed it as one that will go down in music history.

“When people think of classic festival moments they might think of The Jimi Hendrix Experience at the Monterey Pop Festival in 1967 or Nirvana at Reading in 1992,” said one festival-goer.

“For me, it’ll always be a bottle of piss and Cher Lloyd at Chelmsford in 2012.”

V Festival piss bottle

Speaking after it’s set, the bottle of piss spoke of its excitement at performing again in front of a festival crowd.

“I’ve always loved performing on the festival circuit,” it said.

“I remember Reading back in 88.”

“I don’t normally perform other people’s material, but I certainly covered Meat Loaf and Bonnie Tyler that day.”

The bottle of piss went on to reveal that it hoped that the popularity of the performance would give rise to further festival appearances.

“People ask me what it is about festivals that creates a connection between me and the audience,” it said.

“I think the main factor is the three hour queue for the portaloos.”

The new Bottle of Piss album, It Started With a Piss is released on August 28th.

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