Thursday 19 July 2012 by Spacey

Internet not as believable as two-thousand year old fairy stories, reveal 98% of Americans


A study has concluded that 98% of Americans distrust information on the Internet while 92% are perfectly happy with tales of a supernatural creator with unlimited power.

Amongst the reasons given by Americans for their distrust of the Internet were that it could ‘damage their credibility’ and that failure to follow a website’s terms and conditions would be unlikely see them ‘burning in Hell’.

“The Internet needs to instil more fear if it is to be taken seriously,” revealed one participant in the study.

“It’s all very well having the threat of malicious software, but if I’m going to commit I want the threat of angry vengeance in an eternal afterlife, not a long drawn out virus scan.”

US Survey

94% of those surveyed indicated that they felt “bad things can happen as a result of acting on inaccurate information online.”

“One site that I visited said that in the event of a petrol shortage it would be a good idea to stockpile fuel in jerry cans,” revealed another participant.

“I almost became a believer, but it turned out that it wasn’t the fiery pits of Hell that I was rolling around in, but the grass on my front lawn.”

Others participants highlighted the amount of contradictory information available on the web as a major concern.

“There simply isn’t enough of it,” they said.

“It’s got a long way to go before it replaces the Bible.”

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