Thursday 12 July 2012 by Spacey

3500 troops called in to protect G4S directors’ bonuses


Theresa May has revealed that 3,500 extra troops have been called in to ensure that the bonuses of G4S directors are not compromised.

Despite having seven years and vast amounts of unemployed people available, the security firm have failed to provide the 13,700 security staff it was contracted to provide for the upcoming Olympic Games.

Speaking in the House of Commons, Ms May repeatedly refused to answer questions on what penalties G4S would incur as a result of their failings.

“I will need to find out if any cabinet ministers are shareholders in G4S before I can answer that,” she confirmed.

G4S Bonuses

With the number of military personnel contributing to Games security totalling 17,000, those people travelling to the UK for the event from countries such as Bahrain and Saudi Arabia have revealed how delighted they are that the government have taken steps to make them feel at home.

“It’s really thoughtful of the UK to provide soldiers to randomly stop and search us,” said khalid Zakhem from Manama.

“Knowing that they have placed surface-to-air missiles on top of people’s homes entirely against their will is a great comfort to me.”

“The UK people are so lucky to have such a glorious democracy.”

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