People that have tuned in to watch the Leveson Inquiry have been forced to spend the entire time adjusting the brightness on their TVs after David Cameron’s huge Shiny forehead came under questioning.
There was a short delay in proceedings as those gathered at the inquiry were given sunglasses to avoid any damage to their retinas from the intense glow emanating from below Mr Cameron’s hairline.
The Prime Minister’s forehead, which has its own controlled airspace, is capable of producing light of such intensity that if he ventures out after dark he is immediately surrounded by moths.
The watching public have spoken of their frustration at spending the duration of the morning’s questioning fiddling with the brightness control on their TV sets.
“It was so bright that if you closed your eyes you could still see it,” revealed one viewer.
“I got to the point where I had to turn the TV off, but even that didn’t work.”
“I reckon that if I’d held a magnifying glass up to the screen, my living room would have gone up in flames.”
Cameron at Leveson
There was a further break in proceedings when sweat appeared on Mr Cameron’s brow causing a rainbow to appear above his head.
It is hoped that questioning will be concluded this afternoon after scientists warned that a solar flare could erupt from Mr Cameron’s forehead if he remains in the spotlight for too long.
“Anyone in the room would be bombarded by high-energy particles,” warned scientist Dr Lucie Green.
“We’ve seen how close Mr Cameron can come to erupting during Prime Minister’s Questions, and that only lasts for a short while.”
“With him facing questions all day, we could have a major disaster on our hands.”